Re-entry sure is hard

I mentioned that Jason and I went to a marriage conference last weekend. We drove down to Florida and had two nights in a beautiful St. Augustine resort while attending the conference. Saturday night is the scheduled date night. We drove into St. Augustine and walked around in the shops, had dinner at one of those really cool hole-in-the-wall but yummy restaurants, and just enjoyed being together.



The conference itself was wonderful. It was a Family Life Weekend to Remember event. We attended one about 8 years ago. Both times were good but this one was more intense for us. I won't share details here, but I'll just say it was needed and very valuable for us. I highly recommend it for ANY married couple, no matter how long you have been married and no matter the condition of your marriage. I have wanted to blog about it, but I have decided that it was just too personal and I want to keep it between my beloved and myself. Anything I would feel comfortable sharing can be found on the Family Life website...great speakers, names of sessions, etc.



We got home around 9:00PM on Sunday night. We came home to our sweet, sweet girls and were so happy to see them. But the older two had sunburns and Rachel was running a fever. She continued to be sick until Tuesday night. Betsie was clingy and whiney and needed a day or so to re-attach to us. Mary Evelyn was so sweet and gave us a welcome home picture she had made and some applejacks (she said she knew the drive would make us hungry...LOL!), but by Monday morning we were battling a bit. Mary Evelyn was not remembering what it means to honor us as her parents and I confess it was pretty hard to keep my cool a few times. By Tuesday night I decided she and I needed to do something fun together. So I took her to a movie and things have been a lot better since. (not perfect, but better) By the way, I loved Kung Fu Panda...and I am not always a kid movie fan!



Rachel is better but now I am sick. Jason was sweet enough to make sure everyone had breakfast and was settled before he went to work this morning. Plus he made me some hot tea to soothe my raw throat before he left. I do love that man! I think I just have a cold, but colds seem to feel worse the older I get so I am resting a lot...at least until we have to be at swimming lessons this afternoon.



So we are back in the trenches but trying to apply the lessons learned and the old reminders we were given this weekend. I am thankful for the time we had together, for a husband who initiated the whole trip because he is committed to our oneness, and for parents who are willing babysitters. And I am thankful that God is with us in real life.

Homeless On Tuesday

I have been waiting for an opportunity to highlight the Homeless on Tuesday blog. If you have ever clicked on the "Food For Life" link on my sidebar you have already been to this site. I am excited to share a little about the Food For Life ministry and their blog with you.

First, a little context. My husband's brother Paul became a follower of Christ about 7 years ago. Not too long after that, he began ministering to the homeless in our community week in and week out. His parents (my mother and father-in-law) have been right there from day one faithfully serving with him. Paul happens to be a chef and the owner of a local catering business. He uses these gifts (along with the gift of teaching) to feed both body and soul every single Tuesday night. Currently, he is teaching through the book of Romans. The ministry also provides blankets and warm clothing this time of year. (And so much more, but you can read about it on their site!)

With our young family, we have not been able to participate in the ministry like we have wanted to. Jason does serve on the board of directors and helps his brother when he can with administrative type tasks, but we have not been there on Tuesday nights very often at all. However, with Rachel and Mary Evelyn getting a little older, Jason wants to start taking them on at least a monthly basis. This week was their first opportunity to go, and I wanted to share a few pictures with you.

Rachel's job was to serve tea.

Paul with one of the men there to eat and hear God's word

Charity and Mary Evelyn dishing out some food. Charity and Paul have been married for almost 6 months and she has been such a blessing in the Food For Life ministry (and for our whole family).

Mary Evelyn taking a little candy cane break!!!

One of the men that was served this week (Check out his name tag.)

Be sure to visit the Homeless on Tuesday blog for more information and hopefully I'll have more to share about our family's involvement over the coming months.

Sick of Slavery

I hate debt. I hate that because we have debt we cannot save as much money for the future as we'd like. I hate that we can't give as much as we want to give. I want our debt gone and gone for good. I hate that my husband has to work many hours a week to pay creditors.

Jason and I are working to pay off all of our debt. We've been at it for a while. Some of it is from our very costly adoption. Some of it is from a hugely expensive repair made to our nearly 40 year old home...one that we did not foresee and really could not help (except that we had not saved money in anticipation of the inevitable emergency!). Some of it is from our selfish impulsiveness. This time last year we had 7 debts to pay. Now we only have three left. (Plus a mortgage) I am so thankful that at least some of it is gone. We hope to be debt free in about a year.

I want to share a quote with you. This is from the great missionary Hudson Taylor and can be found in this book. "To borrow money implies, to my mind, a contradiction of scripture - a confession that God had withheld some good thing, and a determination to get for ourselves what He had not given." Ouch, ouch, ouch. His contemporary, George Muller, was able to care for thousands of orphans in his lifetime without going into debt for even a penny...ever.

A few years ago, I didn't like being in debt. I knew it was bondage. However, now it is a conviction to no longer use debt. I no longer feel like I can borrow money and honor God at the same time. And I am broken that I have participated in living beyond our means and not been content with God's provision.

But God is so merciful and so good. First of all, He has blessed us with enough. We have more than we need to live and can put extra toward debt. This is a huge blessing. I have a husband who agrees with me and is good at managing money. It is not an uphill battle with him...we are in agreement about the nastiness of the debt monster in our lives. And God has provided His word to guide us, along with many other helpful resources. He has also granted forgiveness and a huge desire to GIVE...which is a great motivation!

One of those helpful resources is Dave Ramsey. Not everyone will like his style, but we have appreciated the simplicity of his babysteps. We have learned a lot from him, but his first baby step has been the most helpful so far. Having a small emergency fund has kept us from further debt while we pay the rest off. And since we don't like to mess with that fund, we constantly reevaluate whether something is truly an emergency or not! Earlier this year my dishwasher broke. We decided this was NOT an emergency and we could wash dishes in the sink...so we did. And then we were blessed with a FREE dishwasher about 6 weeks later from someone who wanted a quieter model. We saved money and let me tell you I REALLY appreciated the dishwasher after weeks of not having one! What a kind Father we have.

I look forward to being debt free. And when that happens, I look forward to praising God and honoring Him with any abundance He gives us.

*

PS...The Teasuer Principle by Randy Alcorn is another awesome resource that will help you see the beauty of giving away what is God's (and not ours) in the first place!

"Adoption", Another Disguise of God's Hand at Work

I asked Jason to guest blog for me since it is Adoption Awareness Month. I thought it might be kind of neat to hear a different perspective for a change! I joke that if had all been up to me, we'd still be doing the homestudy. Jason was Mr. Steady during the whole process and it was Jason that made things happen so efficiently (if efficient can ever be used to describe an adoption). Betsie adores her Daddy and he adores her.

God is never doing just one thing. And adoption is no exception.

When God started dealing with me on adoption, He began His awesome work in many other areas of my life, as well as my wife's life, my children's lives, my new daughter's life, my extended family's lives, etc..... and on and on and on.....

This time, God used the process of "Adoption" to change His people. You see, that is what He is always working on.... change in His people. Sometimes it's a little painful, and sometimes the changes come easy. But change must happen.

He forced me to overcome my selfish desires to keep my lifestyle easy. My other two daughters were growing up, and I liked moving out of the potty-training era. Our kids were finally able to feed and clothe themselves. I liked that. But He told me to start over. It was the best thing for my new daughter... but He was also working on me (He just disguised the work through "Adoption").

And He dealt with my wife on trust. Can we do this? Can we afford it? And the questions got worse the longer we had to wait on our new daughter to arrive. What's wrong with our application? Are we really going to ever get our new daughter?

And, honestly, I don't feel like I've really grown like He wanted me to. But when I look back 5 years ago when God started this "disguised" work, I can say, "I'm not who I was". Jennifer and I can both say that! What a glorious thing that our Father pursues our change... ultimately, for our good! He is so good!

What about you? He's changing you anyway, why not let Him change you through a process called "Adoption?" It's not any scarier than the medical issues you are facing, or the financial issues you are facing, or the fear issues, or the pride issues, or the trust issues, or the covetous issues... you get the point.


And when you are done, you get a beautiful new child to love on - that's the cool part!

God Bless,
Jason

Shhhhhh.........

Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3

That's one of the verses I read this morning...it's one I am trying to remember throughout the day. I heard a sermon the other day (on Walk in the Word) and learned that when Scripture talks about us grieving the Holy Spirit, it is often linked with our words. (See Ephesians 4 for one example.) Is God trying to tell me something? Maybe I just need to be quiet today and speak only what is absolutely necessary or only when I am going to say something edifying. Otherwise, I am praying that God will truly set that guard over my mouth. I think my mouth could use a guard.

He Will Do It

Last night I was at a support group meeting for homeschooling mothers. It was our kick off meeting for the year and was a time of sharing praises, prayer requests, and just praying for each other. Each of us was asked to share a verse that had been an encouragement to us in our homeschooling. Isn't it hard to pick ONE verse out of all of scripture that God has used to bring encouragement? I think so too, so I picked two.

The first one is the verse Nikki shared with me several weeks ago as I was starting a new school year. I was wondering how in the world I was going to do what needed to be done this year. Each year seems to present new challenges and opportunities for being s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-d by God. Last year it was coming home with a baby from China followed by a season of sickness and dealing with getting it all done as she gave up a morning nap, etc. This year has its own challenges that can leave me fearful if I fail to remember His faithfulness. This verse is 1 Thessalonians 5:24 and it says, The One who calls you is faithful, and He will do it. Yes, this is definitely an encourageing verse. I am sure God wants us to homeschool at this time, so it's good to know that He is faithful and that He will do it...because I am simply unable to on my own. By the way, I think a lot of what He will be faithful to do is to change me...not make my kids little geniuses.

The other verse is one that Jason and I memorized together a few weeks ago. I love to go to Psalms before I pray in the morning and then do my regular Bible reading. Sometimes (but not often enough), I get up early, read a few Psalms, then go for a walk and pray for each of my children and my husband, then I come back and read the Bible and pray some more. Those are the best mornings. One morning, and after a really hard day when I was completely overwhelmed, I ended up in Psalm 68 before my walk. Psalm 68:19 says Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. Oh yeah, that was the encouragement I needed. I have meditated on this verse many times since that day. I do tend to try and carry the burdens myself sometimes. It doesn't take long to find that I just can't. It's just too much and my own sins makes them even heavier. What a loving God to carry them for me.

I am so thankful for God's word and the way it can bring us just the encouragement we need.

The Law of the Harvest

Reaping and Sowing...

This seems to be a recent theme in my thoughts lately. Recently one of my children was having trouble getting along with one of her siblings. I brought her into my room and drew a picture of a garden for her. I explained as I drew that if a farmer plants corn, well, corn is what comes up. There is no way that farmer can plant corn and expect carrots to pop up at harvest time.

Elizabeth George says in A Woman After God's Own Heart that we are what we've been becoming. In other words if you are healthy, it's because you have been doing things to stay healthy. You are reaping what has been sown. If you are out of shape, you probably have not been sowing seeds of regular excercise. I know that in a fallen world there are people who are sick not because of their own choices, but many of us have made choices that have caused us to have less than perfect health.

The law of the harvest applies to every single area of our lives: finances, health, relationships, etc. It seems like it would be a good idea to consider what kind of harvest you hope to have later on and then plants those kinds of seeds now. I hope to have a strong marriage that is as enjoyable in the retirement years as in our newlywed days (moreso actually). What seeds need to be sown to reap that kind of harvest? I also hope to have close relationships with my daughters. When I enter heaven I want to hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant." Have I done anything today toward that end?

I listen to Walk in the Word as a podcast. Recently, James MacDonald was teaching about this principle of sowing and reaping too. He made a point which I have been considering...you reap in a later season than you sow. The farmer plants in the spring but he harvests in the fall. I can see this in my life now. The good and the bad in my life is because of choices I have already made. This can be great news though...I can plant seeds now that will reap a harvest of righteousness later. I can choose how to spend my time, how to speak, what to eat, how to spend my money, etc. Yes, there are consequences for poor choices, but there are also rewards for wise choices!

Galations 6:7 says Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; For whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. But don't we live in a culture where it seems like people get away with stuff all the time? Don't many live like God can can be mocked? I am taking God at His word, believing that one day everything will be set right. Those seeds of both righteousness and wickedness will be harvested.

Something else I see in Galations is that we should not lose heart. I've never lived on a farm, but as a Little House on the Prairie enthusiast, I think I can say that farming is very hard work. There is a lot to sowing seeds and keeping the fields in good shape until the harvest. Maybe that is why we are encouraged in Galations 6:9 by these words, Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. It is hard to keep teaching my children when they don't seem to be understanding. It is hard to return a kind word for an unkind word. How many times have I said, "I am tired of this!" But God tells us to keep going...the harvest will come up.

So I am going to keep praying for a good harvest...good fruit...in my life and in the lives of my loved ones. I am asking God to help me remember these principles from His word. And I am asking Him to help me believe it too. I will plant the seeds, but I am trusting God to do the rest. He will be the one to send the rain and the sun. And I will enjoy the harvest in due time.